I had an epiphany today. Or I guess Jimmy helped me to have an epiphany. I consider myself a reasonable person. I believe that there is nothing a good talk (and perhaps some chocolate) can't solve. I hope for world peace one day, and really do hope for it. I'm not just saying that because you are supposed to. I consider myself a Repubicrat. I've coined that term recently. There are values from each political party that hold near and dear to my heart, and I can't be restricted to vote a certain way just because the political party I'm associated with votes that way.
I try to reason with everyone. Honestly I think if everyone could just take the time to understand each other, we would all get along better. If someone says something I don't agree with, I don't fly off the handle at them. I try to explain my point of view, and try to understand why they feel they way they do.
I came home from Church today completely defeated and in tears. While my seating chart did help the class from talking as much, somehow during my lesson political jokes and racist comments started being said. I quickly tried to reign everyone back in, but by that point I felt like the spirit was so far gone it couldn't even find its way back if it wanted to. In short, I failed. Again. After all the effort I've put into trying to succeed in teaching my class something substantial this week, I felt horrible.
I was more horrified at what certain kids said. Really? I'm fairly confident that these children do not hear this kind of talk from their parents. At least I hope. And pray. All we need are more bigots in the world. I think that scared me the most. I couldn't let those kids leave my class thinking it was ok to say stuff like that.
I went over what happened with Jimmy later and he asked me why I even let those topics creep into the lesson in the first place. I explained that I was trying to explain to the kids why what they were saying was not right, and not acceptable. Basically I was trying to reason with them. Jimmy told me that was my 1st problem. Trying to reason with 13 year olds. Hmmm...
He has a good point. I was trying to reason with them. But how can they reason when they have no idea what they are talking about. I forget sometimes that they are only 13 and don't have the knowledge and life experience that I've gained in my 26 soon to be 27 years.
I still find myself trying to reason with Brynlee. It never works out. Hmmm. Peculiar. Maybe I'm too big on reasoning with people. Some people, ie 10 month old infants cannot be reasoned with. And I think to some degree 13 year olds can't either.
I've tried to run my class in a way that if the kids had something they wanted to discuss even if it was slightly off topic we could discuss it. I wanted to keep the class open, so everyone could share what was on their mind. I'm done with that now. My seating chart worked out pretty well ( in that the talking was minimal). Next week if anyone starts to get off topic I will cut them off and guide us back to the topic at hand. Unless the topic they are trying to discuss is worthy of discussing.
Maybe my class isn't that bad. Maybe it's just that I was trying to teach it like I was teaching my peers, as opposed to teenagers. They are 1/2 my age after all. So in this case, " it's not you its me" really does ring true. Rather than trying to change what they do, I'll change what I do and see how it goes. Using a little candy as an incentive won't hurt either!
Waiting for James to arrive!
2 years ago